My Sweetest Downfall
by Lisaslovestories
Summary: It's almost like he had it planned. Like he smiled and shook my hand and said "I'm about to screw you over." E/B. All human. Rated M because.. It's that kind of Edward.
1. Prologue

_A/N: Couldn't get this one out of my head.. It's been torturing me for months now so I had to write it down. _

_Forget everything they've told you about romantic Edward. He isn't in this story. If you want him, there are thousands of other stories out there. This is Assward, Manwhoreward, Bastardward, every frickin' bad version of -wards you can think of. Just wait and see. This is gonna be a god damn mess, I'm just putting it out there. BUT it is a Bella and Edward story, I will never write anything that isn't. N-boy just adds to the excitement ;) _

_Let's begin, shall we? Oh, and I'm music coordinating this one. Every chapter has it's own theme song, and a quote can always be found right at the top. _

_Robyn - Hang with me_

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* * *

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**_Prologue_**

_For 3 years, I had known exactly how my life would turn out. I would marry my wonderful, loving boyfriend and we would live happily ever after. There was nothing that could change that future, because there wasn't anything else in the world that I would ever want more. _

_But I had been wrong, so wrong. Because something would enter my life like how a comet hits the earth and __in just one moment, everything I had ever wanted, desired, planned and hoped for completely vanished, leaving no trace or memory that it had ever been there in the first place. _

_I knew, somewhere deep inside, that he was the man who would be my doom. He was the man who would rip me to shreds and put me together again, only to tear the pieces apart even further the next time. He who would be the life and death of me, and the obliteration of everything I had once known. __It would be so much stronger, so earth shattering that I could not avoid it, even if I had wanted to._

_When you can chose between what is good for you, and what is not, the choice might seem obvious at first. It is when you start craving the bad, when you want the dark and disturbed instead of the light that things get really complicated. _

_Especially when good and bad are so, so closely related…_

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* * *

_

_Just don't fall recklessly, headlessly in love with me  
Cause it's gonna be all heartbreak b__lissfully painful and insanity_

**_-E_**

o o o

"I love you, Bella."

"I love you too. I'll miss you, you know." I smiled, reaching up on my toes to get a goodnight kiss from my boyfriend. His lips met mine and moved against them in the same wonderful way that they always did. Soft, gentle, warm... He was everything I'd ever wanted, everything I ever would want. Not many people know that when they are only 24 years old, but I was certain that I had found the person I belonged with. I had known that for 3 years now, and everyday, I fell more and more in love with him.

"I'll call you tomorrow before I leave, okay?" he said as the kiss ended, running his fingers softly against my jaw. I nodded and then stretched up to give him one last quick kiss before turning around and walking up the stairs to the gate. Opening the door, I turned around and saw him watching me, his smile still as warm and loving as ever.

"Stop staring, you're making me blush." I joked, causing him to laugh.

"As if anything could ever make you blush, Bella."

"I could think of a few things…" I smiled conspiratorially, "but I won't go into that now, so you'd better take off before you miss your flight."

He groaned slightly, "Temptress."

"That's why you love me" I said, "I'll see you again Sunday. It'll be the best birthday you've ever had, I promise."

"I'll hold you to that. You know my entire family is coming, my mom is really looking forward to seeing you again."

"I can't wait to see them, it's been so long. I'm glad they're all here for your 25th birthday, I know how much it means to you."

"I am too. See you soon, sweetheart."

I almost walked back down to kiss him goodbye one more time, but managed to restrain myself. Instead I walked inside and blew him a kiss before the door closed, then leaned against it for a minute, smiling like a fool. How could he still make me all giddy after 3 years? I would often find myself just staring at him, getting lost in those familiar features that I loved so much.

Dark brown hair, deep blue eyes and a smile would melt my heart every time I saw him. Yes, I was head over heels for Nathan. He was the love of my life, of that I was sure.

We had started out as friends in high school, and after a few years that friendship turned into something more. I would never forget our first kiss, that slightly awkward but at the same time wonderful moment when our relationship transformed into something else, something new and unexplored. We had been together almost every day since then.

Nathan was leaving Seattle for a couple of days on business, something he didn't do very often. But now he was handling a big client, and I knew he wanted to do everything he could to do a great job. Including leaving his girlfriend to fend for herself over the weekend while he travelled to New York. Nathan was working in advertising, he had gotten the job thanks to great connections and a brilliant mind, and he was moving quickly up the career ladder, despite his young age.

I was still struggling to make something out of my life. The competition between newly graduated students with a degree in English literature was hard, really hard. I was currently working at a small coffee shop in the city while applying to jobs at different publishing houses. Well, right now I was on a break. There is only so much rejection that a person can take.

Sometimes the thought of working in an office, doing the same thing day in and day out, really scared me. I was afraid of getting stuck, of not wanting anything else out of life than just have somewhere to go during the day and receive a pay check once a month to pay the bills. I guess part of me longed for something out of the ordinary, maybe a chance of not having to have an everyday routine.

I shook my head slightly, giving up that thought. It did no good do dream of such things, I should stay realistic and make the most out of the life I had. And since Nathan was in it, I figured I would be alright.

That night, I slept a little restlessly without Nathan at my side. It's scary how you get so used to having someone there with you, and how hard it is when they're gone.

I was thankful that I wouldn't have to sleep alone the next night. An old boyfriend of my close friend Alice was having a dinner party and had invited us both to come, since he and Alice were still on very good terms with each other. Alice and I had grown up together and stayed best friends to this day. She was a tiny little ball of energy that one, always up for anything and she usually always brought me along. Nathan wasn't sure he liked the effect Alice had on me since he was often the one who had to pick us up when we had been drinking a little too much and gotten lost somewhere. When you added my other best friend, Rosalie, into the mix, you could be sure that the night would bring disaster. She was the most lively, social person I had ever met. There probably wasn't a single person in Seattle that she didn't know or had friends in common with. She was the queen of networking. Rosalie had joined our little group when she moved from Los Angeles to Seattle for school, ending up in the same college dorm as me and Alice.

On Saturday night, Alice arrived at my place around 6. I smiled as I saw Rose trailing in behind her.

"Rose!" I exclaimed, hugging her fiercely. She had been away on vacation for 2 weeks now and I didn't know she'd be back already.

"Hi, Bella!" Rosalie smiled, looking gorgeous as usual. Her blonde hair was a shade lighter, and her skin had a golden, sun kissed tone. Being in the sun really agreed with her.

"How was France?" I asked excitedly, hungry for details. If anyone knew how to enjoy themselves during vacation, it was Rosalie.

She beamed, "Absolutely wonderful! Oh, Bella, we have to go there together some day. I know you would love it." she then went into a minute per minute account of her trip, gesturing wildly and throwing in the occasional French word here and there. We got ready together, fighting over who would get the best spot by the mirror and borrowing each others makeup as usual.

By 7.30 we were all dressed and ready to go. While Alice called us a cab, I sent a text to Nathan, telling him that I was about to head out and that I missed him. I didn't know if he would answer since it was much later in the evening in New York. He would probably be turning in early to prepare for work the next day, but as we left the apartment, I got a text back.

_**Have a great night, and don't let Alice drink you under the table. I m**__**iss you too, baby. I'll talk to you soon.**_

Smiling to myself, I put the phone back into my bag and climbed into the cab after Alice.

o o o

Tyler Crowley had arranged a wonderful dinner party. There were 18 people there except for us. I recognized a few of them; Ben and Angela Chaney had been in my biology class back in high school, we hadn't kept in touch after graduation since I had moved from the small town of Forks, Washington, to go to college and they had both chosen to go to the east coast to finish their studies, but it was really great meeting them again after such a long time. They had already been a couple back then, and Angela told me that they'd gotten engaged a few weeks ago and were to get married next summer.

After enjoying a wonderful meal, we were all making small talk and sipping wine while Tyler and his girlfriend prepared dessert in the kitchen. I was seated next to Alice and a colleague of Tyler, Heidi, who was telling me more than I really wanted to know about her personal life. I felt like her psychiatrist rather than someone she had just met and whose name she probably didn't even remember.

Perhaps I should start charging her by the hour…

Alice was caught up in conversation with a handsome, tall, blond man whose name I believed was Jasper. I knew Alice really well, so I could tell that she was already very into him. She was leaning towards him, a flirtatious smile on her lips as she listened to him talk in a southern drawl about the positive effects of solar panels and the importance of recycling to help the environment. I suspected that Alice was more focused on the way his lips moved than what he was actually saying. Tyler had actually told Alice that he had an old friend who would join them that night, and had insinuated that they might hit it off. I admired Alice's ability to remain friends with her old boyfriends, she was such an easy person to get along with and she never held grudges. Well, there was the exception of that shithead Eric Yorkie who she had dated back in high school…

While Heidi blabbered on and on about her ex boyfriend and how he was the biggest jerk on the planet, I picked up my phone to see if Nathan had texted me again.

He hadn't, so I had no choice but to put the phone down and make another effort to pretend to listen to what Heidi was saying.

I glanced around the room, seeing Rosalie texting on her phone with a grin on her face. Oh Rose, who's the guy you've ensnared this time? I shook my head, smiling, as she looked up to see me watching her. She rolled her eyes, mimed "I'll tell you later" and then went back to talking to the red haired woman to her left.

Just as Heidi went into a detailed description of every frustrating characteristic her ex boyfriend had, the doorbell rang, causing all the conversations in the room to halter. I looked to Tyler, who had a confused expression on his face as he got up from his chair, whispering to Charlotte, his girlfriend, before leaving the room to answer the door.

The chatter started up again, and I reluctantly turned back to Heidi who was the only one who hadn't stopped talking when everyone else had.

"Everyone" Tyler's voice was heard over the conversations, "it appears we have a late arrival. This is my old college friend, Ed."

Heidi stopped talking, staring over my shoulder with her mouth slightly open. I frowned, then turned in my seat to see who it was that had the power to make Chatterbox fall silent.

There was something familiar with the man standing next to Tyler in the doorway. He was tall and broad shouldered but with a lean, toned body. His eyes were a deep green, a striking colour that I knew I had seen somewhere before. Those hypnotising eyes were set in a face that would have any male model crying with envy, and any woman to give up her soul to be with him. Prominent cheekbones, a strong, angular jaw and perfectly straight nose, it was like someone had taken the most perfect features imaginable and set them all in one extraordinary beautiful face. On top of his head was a wild mess of the most unusual coloured hair. Bronze, I suppose you could call it. It stood on end as if he had been running his hand through it constantly during the day, or as if he had just had been rolling around the sack with someone…

But where had I seen him? Why did I remember those eyes, but not the face? I couldn't figure it out, so I figured that I was mistaken.

My phone buzzed in my pocket just then, and I quickly reached for it and answered. Sending an apologetic smile to the other guests, I got up and left the room, but not before receiving a very strange and unnerving glance from the green eyed man. His eyes met mine when I looked up at him as I passed, and I felt a jolt go through me as his eyes pierced mine.

Swallowing hard, I tried to remember how to put one foot in front of the other as I walked into the kitchen. How the hell could someone make me dizzy with just one look? I shook my head, figuring that I was just woozy from standing so quickly when I had been sitting down for so long and also because I had been drinking a fare share of wine in an effort to cope with Heidi's ramblings.

Yes, I decided, it must be the wine.

I leaned against the kitchen table, casting a glance into the dining room where Ed was shaking hands with the guests one after another. He moved so gracefully, like he was extremely comfortable in his body. It was hard to look away as he smiled and chatted to the people around the table.

Suddenly I remembered the reason I had left the dining room.

"Shit." I mumbled, putting my phone to my ear. "Hello?"

A familiar laugh sounded through the phone, "Well hello to you too sweetheart."

"Nathan" I breathed, relaxing instantly. "How are you? Why are you calling so late?"

"Couldn't sleep." he answered, "I miss having you in the bed with me."

I smiled, "Likewise."

"How's the party?"

I turned and glanced towards the dining room again, but this time I didn't see Ed. "It's nice. I think I'll be heading home soon, I'm pretty tired."

"Sounds responsible. So I guess Alice hasn't gotten her hooks into you yet?"

"The night is still young…" I grumbled. If Alice tried to convince me to go out after this I would have to put my foot down for once. I had work tomorrow, and I didn't want to show up looking and acting like a zombie.

We talked some more, and I could hear that his voice got more and more slurry, a sure sign that he was dozing off. When he yawned into the phone, I told him to get some sleep and that I would call him when I got off work the following day.

"Okay, you're right. Hearing your voice is almost as good as having you here to help me sleep." he said, and I knew he was smiling sleepily at the phone.

"I'm glad I could help" I laughed softly.

"I love you, Bella."

"Love you too."

I hung up the phone, still smiling, and turned to head back to the party.

Before I could blink, I bumped into something that was hard, warm and smelled wonderful. A man, I realized quickly, looking up to apologize.

My words stuck in my throat as my eyes trailed upward, taking in the black dress shirt, open at the collar, slightly tanned skin at the neck, scruffy cheeks, crooked smile and then those smouldering green eyes.

I staggered backwards, but his hands shot out to grasp my shoulders. I almost jumped at the contact; it felt like a current running through my body as his warm hands rested on my naked skin.

_What the hell?_

"Careful there. Don't want you falling." he said in a deep, velvet voice that made the muscles in the lower part of my stomach clench. Such an attractive voice…

I steadied myself, grabbing hold of the counter. "I'm alright. You just startled me, that's all."

He dropped his hands from my shoulders, and some strange, unwelcome part of me was disappointed when he did.

"I just went to get another bottle of wine." he said, his eyes never leaving mine. I began to squirm, I wasn't used to being watched like this. He didn't seem to notice my discomfort, instead he took a step closer so that our bodies were almost touching.

Obviously, this man had no respect for personal space.

_Yeah, like you're complaining…_

"Uhm…" I mumbled, fidgeting with the phone in my hands, "I think the wine cooler is over there, next to the glass cabinet." I gestured with my head, finally looking away from his scrutinizing stare.

He was still for a moment but I didn't look up at him again. This had to be the strangest first encounter I had ever had.

"Thank you" he said then, walking past me and letting his hand gently touch my arm in the process. _Again with the current…_ What was that?

When I returned to the table, Alice looked away from Jasper, raising her eyebrows in a silent question. I smiled what I hoped was a normal, unaffected smile and turned to Heidi, for once happy to have her mindless chatter to focus on.

What had just happened in there? Why did he affect me so when I didn't even know him? Who was he? And most importantly, why did I want to go back in there?

Another 40 minutes passed, during which I pretended to listen to the Chatterbox but really only watching Ed in my peripheral vision. He was talking to some blonde woman whose name had escaped me. She was a friend of Charlottes, that's all I remembered. Right now, I doubted she had any idea what her own name was, as she was staring at Ed with lust filled, starstruck eyes. He was charming her tiny little skirt off, I was sure of that. When she didn't stare, she laughed enthusiastically at something he'd said and touched him innocently on his arm or hand.

Well, maybe not so innocently…

He didn't seem to mind though. I had never seen a man who appeared to be so extremely comfortable in his own skin, neither had I met a man who had a whole table of women not so inconspicuously glance his way whenever the other men weren't watching. Even Alice sneaked a peek every now and then while Jasper was busy re-filling her wine glass or got so excited about what he was talking about that he didn't seem to notice if Alice was really listening. Interesting man, that one.

I had been drinking a bit more wine than I probably should have, considering that I had to get up at 8 o clock the next morning to go to work. Had I followed my original plan, I'd been in bed by now, sans headache and slight dizziness.

Why I didn't stick to my plan? Well, I'm afraid to admit that the reason I hadn't yet departed was sitting across the table, showing the blonde woman something that involved him holding her hand in his and tracing the lines in her palm. She was watching him, hypnotised, while he talked in a voice too low for me to hear. He was wearing a small, sexy smile as he gently trailed his fingers over her skin. Palm reading? No, surely not. He was probably just pulling some sweet talking crap so that he could get some tonight. Though he didn't look like the type of guy who would ever need talking in order to get a girl to undress for him.

Swallowing the last of my wine, I took the opportunity to call on Alice's attention while Chatterbox was typing away at her phone. Probably sending hate mails to her ex…

"Hey, Ali? I'm going to the bathroom then I think I'll call it a night." I said, retrieving my bag from the table, "Are you and Rose staying?"

"I think so, Rose is meeting up with some guy later, and I'm not quite ready to go yet." she winked, gesturing towards Jasper, who was now examining if the table cloth had been made from recyclable materials.

Good luck with that one, Alice.

"Okay, I'll see you tomorrow then." I kissed her cheek and got up, said a quick goodbye to Heidi, waved to Rosalie and then went to thank the host couple for a wonderful evening. I pretended not to notice that Ed had let go off the blonde woman's hand and was watching me with intense eyes.

The bathroom was located in a narrow hallway close to the entry, I snuck in quickly to do my business and then threw a look in the mirror before I left. My long, brown hair was in desperate need of a haircut, I noted before opening the door and stepping back out.

I then bumped into someone for the second time that night, once again being held upright by a pair of soft, strong hands. It didn't take me as long to realize who it was this time, as I recognized his scent immediately.

_Intoxicating…_

"Well, you seem strangely keen on being in my arms, don't you?" he laughed quietly.

I shook his arms off, frowning at him as he watched me with an amused expression.

"You seem strangely keen on sneaking up on me." I fired back.

"Sneaking? I wouldn't call it that, I would instead say that you are shockingly unobservant."

"Are your only talents to make people trip over you, insult them and read their palms?" I was really irritated by this point, this guy had some nerve.

He seemed to muse over what I'd said for a while, tapping his finger to his chin. I thought of slipping past him, but something in me told me to stay. Not my moral part, obviously.

"In fact, I do have a few more talents, some of them which I think you'd like."

"If it doesn't have something to do with winning the lottery, I think I'll pass."

"Well, some have said it's even better than winning the lottery." he winked, "Care to try for yourself?"

"I'd much rather take the cash, thank you."

I began to step around him, but he took one step to the side me and forced me to stop. Wordlessly, he walked towards me with his eyes intent on my face, his face void of any former humour. I stepped back, spellbound by the look in his eyes.

My back hit the wall.

"What do you want?"

"I think you know. And I think you want the same."

Is this guy serious? I've never been hit on like this, he was pulling out all the stops.

I shook my head as he came nearer. There was no way I was letting this guy get any closer, I was already in enough trouble as it was. This was not proper girlfriend behaviour, I knew that.

Nathan, Nathan, Nathan… I chanted to myself, trying to conjure up his face in my mind. I came up strangely blank, and at the same time I felt a warm hand skim the edge of my dress, barely touching my thigh.

"I don't want this." I whispered hoarsely, hopefully fooling at least one of us.

He chuckled, "Your body says otherwise."

"You don't know me, and you don't know my body." I said, though I wasn't so sure on that last one. He seemed to be one of those few men who knew how to read a woman's body just by how she moved.

"Then maybe you should introduce yourself…" he spoke in a low, seductive voice. Tingles were sent racing up my back, along with a warning chill.

His fingers moved to grace the skin on the backside of my thigh, and before I knew it, he lifted my leg and moved forward so that he was pressed against me, hitching my leg around him.

My breath caught at the sudden movement, and then sped up as the sensation of that especially hard part of his body pressed against me just _there…_

The warning chill was now an earsplitting fire alarm, beckoning me to regain my senses and stop this.

"Do you feel it?" he breathed, close to my ear.

_Of course I feel it, it's poking me in the hip._I wanted to snap at him, but I didn't. Because I did feel what he was asking about, it was almost touchable in the air around us.

_Desire, want, attraction._ All of it, and then some…

His face pressed into my hair, and my forehead rested on his shoulder as I tried to breathe and look for some inner strength to stop this madness. He smelled so good, and his body against mine was just…

"Bella! What the hell is going on here?"

Mind snapped back in place. Leg dropped. Ed shoved to the side. A blush covering my cheeks as I snuck past Rosalie before she could grab hold of my arm or my neck.

I ran out and into the bitter, darkening night and didn't stop until I reached my front door. Opening it, I slipped inside and then slid down the wall until I hit the floor, covering my face in my hands.

o o o

_**Sunday afternoon**_

I stood in the foyer, shaking hands and hugging all of Nathan's relatives as they trailed in one after another. He was standing beside me, keeping a hand on my lower back as we greeted the guests and welcomed them to come in and make themselves at home in his apartment.

I hadn't said a word about what had happened Friday night, not to anyone but Rose and Alice. I was kind of forced to do so since Rose had been terrorising my phone the entire night and following day after she'd found me with Ed. I might have skipped the part about how I hadn't really made any effort to discourage his flirting, and also the part about how I had been dreaming of our encounter for the last two nights…

I kept telling myself that it didn't matter. I would never see him again, so I didn't have to dwell on it. There was no point in telling Nathan, because nothing had really happened.

Yes, I was quite skilled at lying to myself. To others too, it would seem.

After greeting the last of his cousins to arrive, Nathan went into the living room that now housed 23 of his relatives, all of them chatting and laughing loudly. I smiled, hung the last coat up and turned to join them.

There was a knock on the door just then. Confused, I opened it to see if we had indeed forgotten a cousin or aunt despite our counting.

When the door fell open, I staggered backwards, hand over my heart.

He was standing there. He, as in Ed. He was standing in the doorway, a slight smirk on his face as he regarded me with raised eyebrows.

I shook my head once and then looked over my shoulder to make sure that no one was close enough to hear or see.

"What the hell are you doing here? Are you seriously stalking me?" I half whispered, outraged.

One corner of his mouth turned up, he leaned against the doorframe, looking dangerously handsome and confident. I though about slamming the door shut and squeezing his fingers.

Tempting…

"I'm not stalking you, Miss Swan." he said in that seductive tone of his. Then straightened up, looking at something over my shoulder. "I'm here to see the birthday boy."

My eyes grew huge, I swallowed hard before slowly turning around to see Nathan standing a few feet behind me, an expression of total shock on his face.

"Edward?" he sounded as if he couldn't believe the sight before him.

"Edward?" I echoed.

And then realization dawned on me. Ed was Edward Cullen.

Edward Cullen, as in Nathan's adopted older brother.

I might have turned green.

Edward smirked and winked at me before stepping forward to take Nathan's hand.

"Happy birthday, little brother."

* * *

I have partial writersblock. Right now, all I can focus on is this one and finishing up BCI. The others will come too, I promise. Just needed to get this one out there.

I would love to hear from you if you think it's worth continuing!


	2. Chapter 1

**A/N: As promised, here comes Assward. You have no idea how much I love writing this!**

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The Pierces - Secrets

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**Chapter One**

_Got a secret, can you keep it? Swear this one you'll save. Better lock it, in your pocket  
taking this one to the grave, if I show you then I know you  
won't tell what I said, 'cause two can keep a secret i__f one of them is dead…_

_Why do you smile like you have told a secret, now you're telling lies 'cause you're the one to keep it. But no one keeps a secret, no one keeps a secret.  
Why when we do our darkest deeds do we tell? They burn in our brains, become a living hell  
Cause everyone tells, everyone tells…_

**_-B_**

I was in the kitchen putting the leftovers in the fridge when I felt someone come up behind me. I knew it wasn't Edward, I could still hear him from the living room, telling stories about his adventures and causing every single person to burst out in loud, collective "ooh" and "wow" every other second. That man was some story teller, and he had plenty to share.

"Hey" Nathan said, putting his arms around my waist and pulling me towards his chest. He rested his chin on my shoulder as I placed the plastic boxes wherever they would fit on the overstocked shelves.

"Hey" I said back, trying to sound like my old, cheerful self. "How's it going?"

He let go of my waist and jumped up to sit on the counter, picking up a strawberry from the bowl next to him and popping it into his mouth. "It's great, Bella. I can't believe Edward showed up, I was so surprised!"

"Yeah, you and me both…" I mumbled, turning to throw the food that wasn't worth saving in the trash.

Nathan didn't seem to have heard me, he kept chatting while I worked around him with tidying up the kitchen. Typical male behaviour if you ask me.

"I'm so glad you got to meet him, I've wanted to introduce you forever. I haven't seen the guy in two years… Remember? The one time he came here you were in Italy with Alice. It was such a damn coincidence! Well, Edward comes and goes as he pleases. Always have, always will."

I washed my hands, trying desperately to keep my expression in check and avoid looking in his direction. He could read my face so well, and I didn't want to risk him getting suspicious.

"Mhm." I mumbled, pulling out plates from a cabinet, "I guess that comes with the job. Has to be great to be that kind of journalist and get to travel for a living. I wouldn't stay in one place for long either."

"Oh, it has nothing to do with the job. Edward's just like that. He's constantly moving, I don't think he's ever stayed more than a few months in the same place since he was a kid and living with us. I wonder if he will ever just meet a girl and settle down. Maybe if he finds someone who can live up to his high standards and doesn't just throw herself on him." he mused, picking up another strawberry.

"I would have thought he liked it when the girls threw themselves at him. Saves him the trouble of hunting them down."

"Oh, I don't think Edward has ever had to chase a girl in his entire life." Nathan chuckled, "I remember the first time he took me out drinking, when I was just 17 and he was 22. He was friends with the owner of the club we went to so I didn't have to show ID or anything. Anyway, the girls were throwing themselves at him then and I don't think that has changed."

"I remember that time. You were so excited that Edward had come to visit, even if he only stayed a day. I missed him that time too." I furrowed my brows, wishing that I had met him back then so I had known who the hell he was when he showed up yesterday.

I'd realized why I had recognized those green eyes. It was from a picture I had seen of him and Nathan when they were kids. Their mother, Esme, had showed it to me when we had gone to visit them a year or so ago. Edward couldn't have been more than maybe 10, 11 at the most, but his eyes were exactly the same. Apparently, he wasn't a fan of being photographed; there weren't any pictures of him since then.

"Yeah, that was before we were together." Nathan caught my hand when I put the plates on the table. "Back when we were just friends. Feels like forever ago."

I nodded, "Sure does."

A quiet cough from behind made me turn to see Edward standing in the doorway.

"Is this the Edward Cullen fan club? I've heard my name being spoken more often than when I walk down the street without my mask on."

Nathan laughed while I tried not to fire back with a snappy comment. I couldn't act like I didn't like him, he had given me no reason why I shouldn't. Today, at least. And that meant that Nathan would be confused if I started being rude to his beloved brother all of the sudden.

"Wearing a mask? Is that necessary? Don't you think you should let people know who you are?"

Wow, Bella. How inconspicuous of you.

Edward raised an eyebrow, looking amused. His expression kind of said, "Sure you wanna do this now?"

Mine probably said "You're the biggest scumbag in the whole world and you should be neutered for the good of the planet."

"It's much more fun to hide your true self, you get a better chance at seeing other people for who they are."

"So deception is your way of getting to know someone?"

"Sometimes, yes. It can be very revealing."

"And when they find out who you really are?"

"They I sit back and watch it play out as it may."

"Even if you totally fuck someone over?" _I should probably back down by now…_

He smirked, "Especially if I get to fuck someone over. And over, and over…"

Nathan laughed and held up his hands, "Okay, okay, Edward. We get it!"

Edward chuckled, still watching me. "Quite the feisty girl you've got there, little brother. Can you keep up with her?"

"Yes, he can." I said before Nathan could answer. No way in hell that he was coming here and start asking questions about mine and Nathan's relationship.

Mrs. Cullen called on Nathan from the living room, and he gave us both a smile before exiting the room, leaving us alone.

I crossed my arms over my chest and stared at him, waiting for him to explain himself.

He leaned against the wall, still smiling as if he was watching an extremely interesting and amusing reality show.

"You're an ass." I finally snapped, not able to keep quiet any longer.

Edward chuckled, "Thanks. You have a great ass."

"You have no moral standards at all, do you?"

"You have way to much, don't you?"

"How could you do that to your brother?"

"How could you?"

"I didn't do anything!" I spat, dropping my arms to my sides and taking a step forward in aggravation.

"No? Then whose leg was hitched around mine the other day?" he stepped towards me.

"That… That doesn't count. You caught me off guard."

"Oh please, Bella. You want me so bad, you haven't even noticed that your nipples has gone hard and are staring straight at me." he glanced down at my chest.

I gasped, folding my arms over my chest again and raising my chin. I felt a blush cover my cheeks.

"It's cold in here."

"The hell it is." he stepped again so that we were only inches apart, and I felt the warmth of his body against mine. I hoped he couldn't see that my hands were shaking. "You're so turned on by me right now that you wouldn't even protest if I grabbed you and fucked you on the counter where your boyfriend sat a few seconds ago."

My eyes grew huge at his absurdity, "What are you talking about?"

"You're biting your lip and licking it, your breathing is uneven and shallow, you can't take your eyes off me, you're squeezing your thighs together and then of course, the nipple situation. You're much more obvious than you think, Bella."

"Shut up." I took a step backwards but he followed, his eyes blazing.

"Make me."

I thought of punching him in the face. Probably not such a good idea since 23 of his loving relatives was in the next room.

"Stop coming on to me."

He reached one hand out, almost touching my waist. His face was only inches from mine as he leaned forward, angling to whisper in my ear.

"Start coming on top of me…"

I didn't have time to think before I heard footsteps coming closer, and then the sound of clatter from behind me. I realized Edward had reached to take the plates from the counter I was pressed up against. He swirled around and left an appropriate distance between us just as Esme entered the kitchen, carrying the last of the dishes from our meal.

Her eyes were wary as she looked from me to Edward, taking in our stiff poses and taut expressions.

"Is everything alright in here?"

I gave her what I hoped was a convincing smile, "Yes, everything is fine. We're just getting acquainted."

Esme didn't look quite convinced, but since she didn't seem to know what to make of the situation, she simply smiled and put the dishes in the dishwasher before she walked back out.

"That was close." Edward snickered, close to my ear.

This time I flung my arm up and smacked his cheek before he could pull away. I didn't hit him hard, but he pretended to be hurt. He was holding his hand to his face as he stared at me with an open mouth.

"Well now, Miss Swan, I didn't think you had it in you. Oh, this just opened up a whole new window of opportunities for us. Tell me, do you like to be the Dom, or do you prefer to be a Submissive?" he gave me a devious smirk as he leaned in again, "I'm good with what ever you choose just as long as there are handcuffs involved."

I forced myself not to visualize what he was saying, but it proved to be too hard for my weak, overworked brain. I needed a break from this man, ASAP.

"The only handcuffs you'll see are the one's the police will put on you after I've called them to report that a crazy, perverted sex maniac is stalking me and invading my personal space. Now, get out of here and bring those plates with you."

I turned my back to him to take out the cake I had prepared from the oven, hoping he would do as I said for once. He was so damn frustrating, I didn't know what to make of him. How could a person be so… so void of any sense of right and wrong? Nathan hadn't told me much about where Edward had been or what he had gone through before he came to live with them, I only knew that his mother had died in cancer when he was 3 and then his father had disappeared, leaving 8 year old Edward behind. I hadn't pressed for more information, I didn't know how much more Nathan knew regardless. Since I had never met Edward, and his family didn't often speak of him since he very rarely kept in touch to inform them about what he was doing or where he was living, I had considered Edward to be something of an enigma. I had heard stories about him, of course. He would travel the world, date rich and powerful women in every county he visited only to leave them a couple of weeks later and never contact them again. He was quite the famous ladies man, and despite his efforts to stay out of the gossip columns, his name would appear frequently, always without picture. I bet the guy was camera shy. But it sure added to his enigma.

His job seemed to fit him perfectly. He wrote a praised column in the New Yorker, kind of like a male version of Carrie Bradshaw, only with a dirtier language and more focus on sex than actual relationships. Because of its success, he was allowed to travel wherever he wanted to get inspiration and writing material. According to Nathan, he was also writing a book…

Any guess to what it's about?

Yeah, sex. Big surprise there.

We had dessert and chatted for another hour or so, Edward entertaining the group with his antics once again while I tried to laugh along with the others at his jokes. I had to admit, he was very enchanting to listen to. He had a way with words that was captivating and colourful, allowing you to experience everything with him as he spoke. It was a gift all the best writers shared.

When everyone had finished their cake and the last of the coffee was gone, people began to leave in groups. I said goodnight and thanked everyone for coming, noticing Esme's slightly worried expression as she came up to say her goodbyes. She didn't mention anything, but I was sure that she really had picked up on something between me and Edward.

Edward stayed when everyone else left, he was sleeping in Nathan's guest bedroom since he hadn't had time to find a hotel yet. I tried to sound glad that my boyfriend and his brother would have so much time to talk and re-connect, but I'm not sure how it really came across.

Later that night, when I was just getting ready for bed, my phone buzzed on my nightstand table. Picking it up, I saw that it was Nathan calling.

"Hey baby." I said as I slid on my favourite sleep t-shirt, which I had stolen from Nathan two years ago.

"Hey, honey. I can't talk for long, I just wanted to let you know that I'm leaving town again tonight." he sounded stressed, and I could hear the distinct sounds of an airport in the background.

"Are you okay? What's happened?"

"There have been some conflicts with the new client, so the company wants me to go back to New York and help sort everything out. It might take the whole week, I'm not sure yet, but I'll call you as soon as I know, okay?"

I sat down on the bed, chewing on my bottom lip. This was not good at all… I needed him here now, especially if Edward would hang around for any length of time.

"Okay, Nathan. Good luck with everything, I hope you make it back soon."

"I do too… I'll call you tomorrow, sweetheart."

"Sleep tight. I miss you."

I went to bed feeling like I had been hit by a train, thrown off a cliff and pushed down a rockslide. My head was so messed up that I fell asleep just thinking about all the shit that had happened that day.

o o o

Monday morning I woke up not by the sound of my alarm clock, but by the constant drops of water hitting my forehead.

"What the…" I mumbled as I opened my eyes. Looking around the room with blurry vision, I saw that the floor was practically covered in water.

I jumped up, my feet sloshing as they hit the wet floor. "Shit, shit, shit!" I cried, rushing for the phone.

An hour and a half later, I was on my way to work, dressed in the only dry clothes I could find a pair of shoes I'd had stocked on a shelf instead of on the soaking floor. I had called the landlord, who was apparently on the way over already after having received a call from the tenant living in the apartment below me. The leak had started in the apartment straight above, and was quickly spreading. I had been told that the damages would take at least a week to fix, probably more, so I was also carrying a big bag full of clothes that I would bring over to Nathan's place where I had decided to stay during the time they worked on my apartment. I really hoped Edward would have found a new place to stay be now…

When my work day was finished, I picked up my heavy bag and walked the 4 blocks over to where Nathan lived. I had tried calling him several times, but it wasn't until I was already in the hall outside his front door that he picked up.

"Hi, Nathan, I've been trying to call you…" I told him about the leak and that I was heading over to him to stay there instead.

"Of course you can stay at my place, honey, it's just one thing."

I put my bag down and pulled out my key, pinching the phone between my ear and shoulder as I struggled to open the locks. "What thing?"

The door suddenly flung open, revealing a shirtless Edward standing in the doorway, his hair in a complete disarray and wearing only a pair of sweatpants.

He grinned when he saw me stare at his naked chest.

"Edward is staying there too." Nathan spoke in my ear.

I dropped the phone.

* * *

_Comments make my day :) I would love to hear what you make of this so far!_


	3. Chapter 2

**A/N: Woaa.. I don't even remember how to do this anymore. FF looks weird these days! Uhm. Well. What can I say? Will a heartfelt "I'm sorry" be enough? I guess not.. Almost a year and not a word, I think I owe you more. If any of you are still there, that is? Okay, I'll shut up now and continue apologizing later. **

_Panic at the Disco - I write sins not tragedies_

* * *

**Chapter two**

_I chime in with a "Haven't you people ever heard of closing the god damn door?"  
No, it's much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality.  
I'd chime in "Haven't you people ever heard of closing the god damn door?"  
No, it's much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of..._

**-B  
**

I was pretty sure that my mouth was hanging open. Try as I might, I couldn't seem to tear my eyes away from the vision of Edward's toned, perfectly sculptured chest. He looked like what one would expect one of the Greek God's to look like.

I bit my lip slowly… Maybe I should just reach my hand out and see if his skin really is as soft and smooth as it looks… Just trail my fingers down his happy, happy trail… Trace his V…

"I charge 10 bucks an hour for ogling, 15 bucks for touching. An extra 5 if you go below the waist."

My eyes snapped back up to his face. He was grinning, his eyes full of mischief. Muttering to myself, I picked up my phone, pretending not to notice that he checked out my ass while I bent down.

"Hey, Nathan? I'm sorry, I dropped the phone. Edward scared me." I looked him square in the face as I spoke, wearing my "don't fuck with me" expression.

"It's okay. You gonna be alright staying there with him? I don't think he'll be there for too long, you know how it goes. Probably won't even sleep there if you know what I mean." Nathan laughed.

"Do I ever…" I mumbled, pushing past Edward into the apartment. "I'll speak to you later, love you."

"Love you."

I hung up and swirled around to stare at the absurdly gorgeous, half naked man who was still grinning at me. He closed the front door and walked towards me, but I held up my hands.

"If this is going to work, you'll have to get a better grasp on what 'personal space' means. And don't look at me as if you think I want to sleep with you, because I don't"

"Who said anything about sleeping?" he asked, a wicked gleam in his eyes.

I sighed, then sniffed the air. _What the…?_

"Why does it smell like sex in here?" I looked around for the first time, noticing the pile of clothes lying on the floor outside the guest bedroom. I froze.

Edward just chuckled, "That's probably me."

My jaw dropped. "Do you have a girl here?"

"Yes. I can introduce you if you'd like. She's from France, I believe her name is Francesca something." he wiggled his eyebrows, "Very bendy."

"Oh God…" I moaned, covering my eyes. "Are you serious? You brought a girl to your brother's apartment? When and where did you even find her?"

"Aren't you the curious one?" Edward walked towards his bedroom. I tried not to notice the way his muscles flexed when he moved… "Make yourself at home. I'm gonna go learn some more French words. All I've got so far is 'Voulez-vous coucher avec moi', which, by the way, is very effective."

"You're disgusting."

He laughed, "Don't mock it until you've tried it."

"I'll pass."

"Suit yourself. I'll be in there" he gestured towards the door, "for at least… 3 more hours. Give or take 30 minutes. Feel free to join us if you change your mind."

I couldn't come up with a response before he had walked inside, not quite shutting the door behind him.

o o o

"Oh, mon dieu!"

_Thump_

"Sacrebleu!"

_Squeak, squeak_

"Je suis proche, Eduarrrd…"

"Mmm…"

I couldn't believe this. I was in Nathan's room, trying to read a novel but constantly getting interrupted by groans, moans and various French curse words. And then the thumping, of course. That god damn thumping.

It was now midnight, and according to Edward, his bendy friend should have left about 2 hours ago. Guess she was teaching him a few French words that he hadn't anticipated…

I turned the volume up on my Ipod, but it was to no avail. Either the walls were really thin, or they were louder than people normally were while having sex. Probably a combination of the two. Either way, there was no way I would get any sleep at all while they were making all that noise.

I put my book away, closed my eyes and let the words of Kings of Leon fill my ears, trying to focus on the music and not the thumping.

o o o

"Bella? Are you awake?"

I groaned and slowly opened my eyes, blinking a few times to get the sleep out of my eyes. When I could see again, I gasped and jerked the duvet up to my chin to cover myself.

"What the hell, Edward? Why are you in my room?" I hissed, sitting up against the bed frame. He was perched on my bed, wearing a blue t-shirt and sweatpants. He had a slight stubble on his cheeks and his hair was damp. A scent of body wash clung to him, so I guessed he had been showering.

Showering? In the middle of the night?

Edward chuckled, "Oh, there are a few reasons. Firstly because you've been saying my name in your sleep for the past 30 minutes, and secondly because I didn't want you to be late for work."

"What do you mean, 'late for work'? It's not even morning yet." I frowned, and then looked towards the alarm clock on the bedside table.

The bright red numbers declared that it was 7.32 am. 28 minutes before I had to be at work. I had fallen asleep before setting the alarm.

"Oh shit!" I called, throwing my duvet off without thinking. Edward's eyebrows shot up as I sprinted out of bed wearing only a white tank top and a pair of blue hotpants. Had I been less stressed out, I would probably have asked him to leave before running around half naked in the room, yanking out clothes from my bag and searching for a hair tie in a drawer Nathan had given me to keep my overnight things. But as it were, I had other things on my mind. Like not arriving late and getting fired.

Edward flopped on to my bed with his hands behind his head, watching me. "You're quite entertaining in the mornings." he said as I pulled on a pair of socks. "Both conscious and unconscious."

That made me stop, I froze with one leg in my jeans. "What are you talking about?

The corner of his mouth twitched, and I suddenly realized what he had said before. _You've been saying my name in your sleep for the past 30 minutes._

Oh God no.

He leaned against the bed frame, wearing a face of complete nonchalance. "Oh don't feel embarrassed, it's perfectly reasonably for you to dream about me. We both know how you feel about me."

"Say what? How I feel about you?" I asked, dumbfounded.

"You're completely enchanted by me."

"Oh my god, Edward. Could you be any more arrogant?"

"Bella the difference between arrogance and self confidence is perception." he said, a devious smirk playing around his lips, "I just happen to know I'm fucktastic, and you will realize that too eventually."

I pointed towards the door, giving him a death glare. "Out."

He just laughed and got off the bed, walking out the door.

Damn it, this was not good. Not good at all…

o o o

My mind was in a haze the entire time I was at work. I couldn't seem to concentrate on even the simplest task, which led to a lot of customers getting the wrong type of coffee or having to pay for one muffin when ordering two. Angela, a sweet girl who worked at the coffee shop with me, helped me out by offering to handle the customers so that I could hide in the kitchen instead and take care of the dishes.

I knew what it was that had me so confused and scatterbrained. "It" happened to be the man who's ripped, smooth stomach muscles I couldn't seen to banish from my memory. The man who I was sharing apartment with for an unknown amount of days…

While walking back to Nathan's after the work day had ended, I prayed to the god's of Girlfriends-who-can't-deny-that-they-are-attracted-to-their-boyfriend's-brothers that Edward would have moved out by now. He was known for moving quicker than a herpes infection among drunken teenagers on a high school dance, so why not?

I held my breath as I unlocked the front door and pushed it open, then paused inside as I listened for any sound that would indicate that Edward was busy learning another foreign language.

Silence.

Wonderful!

I exhaled, smiling to myself and dropped my bag onto the floor. After hanging my jacket away, I walked into the apartment and checked all the rooms just to make sure.

Bedrooms – empty. Kitchen – empty. Bathroom – empty. Living room – empty.

I relaxed on the couch with a glass of white wine, treating myself to a little well deserved alone time. I turned on the TV, smiling as I saw that my favourite guilty pleasure, The Ellen show, was on.

"Fucktastic." I murmured, remembering Edward's word from this morning. What ever the hell it meant.

A low chuckle from behind me had me choking on my wine. I jumped up and saw Edward leaning against the wall.

"Damn it, Edward! Will you stop sneaking up on me all the time? It's getting annoying." I snapped, putting my glass down on the table and wiping my chin off.

"Once again, it's not my fault that you are unobservant, Bella." he smirked, and then walked around to sit down on the couch.

I glared at him. "Are you going to sit there?"

"Yes, as the matter a fact I am."

"Good." I said, grabbing my glass and trudging out of the room.

o o o

I opened my eyes and was met by darkness. What had woken me? I thought I had felt something soft against my right arm. I listened for sound, but there were none. I yawned and put my head back on the pillow, waiting for sleep to reclaim me.

I had barely closed my eyes before I felt something against my skin again, this time on my shoulder. Slowly, I turned my head.

"Shhh… Don't talk, Isabella…" he whispered into my ear. The sound of my name in his velvet voice awaked a million butterflies in my stomach. I swallowed hard, feeling his feather light fingers trail from my shoulder and around to my collarbones. The bed shifted as he climbed in.

"I want you. I've wanted you since the first time I ever laid eyes on you." his body pressed up against mine, his hot breath tickling the skin behind my ear. My eyes rolled back into my skull as I felt his lips lightly trail along my jaw, dropping down to kiss my throat and then continuing down, down, down…. His hands roamed my sides as I let my fingers slip into his hair, unconsciously pushing his head down to where I needed his lips the most. I arched my back as he kissed and licked his way closer, shivering when he softy ran his nose against the sensitive skin between my legs. "I'm going to make you feel things you didn't even know you could feel." he whispered, letting his fingers dig into my hips. It was only just not painful. "I can fulfil your wildest dreams, Bella… All you have to do is say that you want me to."

I closed my eyes and bit down on my lip, realizing that there was no way I could let him stop now. I needed him. Badly.

"I want you to fuck me, Edward. Right now"

Suddenly the light was switched on. I startled awake and sat up in my bed, still feeling the ache between my legs. It was all a dream… Fuck. I blinked a couple of times and tried to adjust my eyes to the bright light. When my vision cleared, I saw Edward standing in the doorway, his hand on the light switch. By the look on his face, I was pretty damn sure I'd said that last line out loud.

I really needed to put a lock on that door.

* * *

_Worth a years wait? No, it's not, I know. I'm trying to get back to writing, I haven't written a single word since January so it feels kind of unfamiliar. Lot of things have happened, many of them bad, which is why I have been absent for so long. I left L.A in June and have been in Sweden since then. Three months from now I'm moving to Australia. Can't seem to keep still. I beg of you to please be patient while I try to find my words again. Next up is High Maintenance. _

_Love. _


End file.
